According to Luke 6:45, the good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks. The true nature of the heart can often be seen when they speak off-the-cuff and without reflection. And let me just tell you that some pretty ugly stuff has been coming out of my mouth lately. Ugly and hurtful. Because my heart is not filled with the Word of the Lord. It's filled with...busyness.
I woke up this morning...starving. For spiritual food. Literally starving. So I got out of the bed, brushed my teeth, threw on some clothes, packed up my Bible & a notebook and headed straight to Starbucks...for some much needed and long overdue, unhurried time with God. Once I got settled, I asked God to show me something...anything...about myself.
After Saul tries to kill David SEVERAL times, David is faced with a difficult decision...killing Saul or sparing his life. And he chooses to spare Saul's life out of respect for God's appointment of Saul as king and patience to wait for God's timing. Rather than return evil for evil, David chooses obedience. David was able to spare Saul's life because He was in tune with God.
Here's the bottom line...I can do nothing on My own initiative. As I hear, I judge; and My judgment is just, because I do not seek My own will, but the will of Him who sent me (John 5:30). I can do NOTHING apart from the Spirit of the Living God . I know that God desires the same obedient and loving response He got from David, from me. But when I'm empty...and depleted...starving of spiritual food...I have nothing good to give God or those around me. Nothing good. And worse, when I'm wandering aimlessly, I slowly but surely find myself outside of His will for my life. And I don't like who I become. Mean...impatient...vengeful...sarcastic...just plain ugly.
So I ask that you pray with me and for me...this prayer...
Lord, I recognize that I'm broken and still have a lot of work to do to address the ugly parts of my heart. Thank you for speaking to me through your Word. For clearly showing me the error of my sinful ways. Thank you for your grace and new mercies. For another opportunity to be in right standing with You and to reconcile with those I've hurt as a result of my ugly heart. I'm sorry for being too busy to spend time with you each day. And if/when I prioritize the busyness of life over You again, I pray You humble me just like You did today. In Jesus name, Amen.
If you're still reading, thank you for allowing me to ramble. I covet your prayers...today and everyday. How can I be praying for you?